1. Priority is based on vehicle size:

- Buses have priority over everything
- SUV's have priority over cars
- Cars have priority over auto rickshaws
- God help anyone on a bike

2. The passenger capacity of a motorcycle is only limited by the size of your family

3. When pulling out onto a main road from a side road - look away from the oncoming traffic in case the other drivers mistakenly believe you will not pull out

4. The horn is NOT to be sounded on the following occasions:

- When the driver is not in the vehicle

5. Driving is a full contact sport - so remove any mirrors or other non value-adding attachments before they are removed for you

6. Beware of auto rickshaws in apparently stationary traffic - they can go sideways

7. Roundabouts must be negotiated at full speed without any regard for other road users. Never give the slightest hint that you may give way as this would confuse other drivers

8. Use of indicators is not recommended as it is seen as a sign of weakness

9. When waiting at traffic lights or level crossings - use both lanes and meet any oncoming traffic with determination

10. Slip roads onto major highways can be used in either direction

11. All lanes of multi-lane highways can be used for two way traffic

12. No entry signs only apply if there is an (awake) policeman present

13. Motorcycle helmets are illegal

14. Use of a mobile phone whilst driving is compulsory

15. Ambulances and other emergency vehicles displaying flashing lights and sounding two tone horns are to be ignored completely

16. Traffic Light Sequence:

Green - Go
Amber - Go
Red - Go

17. Brakes are for sissies

18. The other driver is always wrong

19. In the event of an accident:

- Stop your vehicle immediately
- Get out of your vehicle and exchange blows with the other driver

20. Always maintain a safe stopping distance from other vehicles of at least 3 millimeters


Check me out on the WWW

---

Sick sense of humor? Visit Yahoo! TV's Comedy with an Edge to see what's on, when.