Fw: HINDUSTAN LEVER SUED!

Fri Oct 23, 2009 7:18 am (PDT)




New Delhi. In what could prove to be a major marketing and legal embarrassment
for Hindustan Unilever Limited (HUL), a 26-year-old man has filed a case against
the FMCG company, which owns the Axe brand of men grooming products, for
`cheating' and causing him `mental suffering'. The plaintiff has cited his
failure to attract any girl at all even though he's been using Axe products for
over seven years now. Axe advertisements suggest that the products help men in
instantly attracting women.

Vaibhav Bedi, the petitioner, also surrendered all his used, unused and
half-used deodorant sprays, perfume sticks and roll-ons, anti-perspirants,
aftershaves, body washes, shampoos, and hair gels to the court, and demanded a
laboratory test of the products and narcotics test of the brand managers of Axe.
Vaibhav was pushed to take this step when his bai (maid) beat him with a broom
when he tried to impress her by appearing naked in front of her after applying
all the Axe products.

No girl ever asked Vaibhav to call her
"Where the f****** is the Axe effect? I've been waiting for it for over seven
years. Right from my college to now in my office, no girl ever agreed to even go
out for a tea or coffee with me, even though I'm sure they could smell my
perfumes, deodorants and aftershaves. I always applied them in abundance to make
sure the girls get turned on as they show in the television. Finally I thought
I'd try to impress my lonely bai who had an ugly fight with her husband and was
living alone for over a year. Axe effect my foot!" Vaibhav expressed his
unhappiness.

Vaibhav claims that he had been using all the Axe products as per the company's
instructions even since he first bought them. He argued that if he couldn't
experience the Axe effect despite using the products as directed, either the
company was making false claims or selling fake products.

"I had always stored them in cool and dry place, and kept them away from direct
light or heat. I'd always use a ruler before applying the spray and make sure
that the distance between the nozzle and my armpit was at least 15 centimeters.
I'd do everything they told. I even beat up my 5-year-old nephew for coming near
my closet, as they had instructed it to keep away from children's reach. And
yet, all I get is a broom beating from my ugly bai." Vaibhav expressed his
frustration.

Vaibhav claims that he had to do go a lot of mental suffering and public
humiliation due to the lack of Axe effect and wants HUL to compensate him for
this agony. An advocate in Karkardooma court, who happened to mistake Vaibhav
for some deodorant vendor when he entered the court premises with all the
bottles, has now offered to take up his case in the court. HUL has been served a
legal notice in this regard.

HUL has officially declined to comment on the case citing the subject to be sub
judice, but our sources inform that the company was worried over the possible
outcomes of the case. The company might argue that Vaibhav was hopelessly
unattractive and unintelligent and didn't possess the bare minimum requirements
for the Axe effect to take place. Officially HUL has not issued any statement,
but legal experts believe that HUL could have tough time convincing the court.

"HUL might be tempted to take that line of argument, but it is very risky. There
is no data to substantiate the supposition that unattractive and unintelligent
men don't attract women. In fact some of the best looking women have been known
to marry and date absolutely ghoulish guys. I'd suggest that the company settles
this issue out of court." noted lawyer Ram Jethmalani said.